Where am I Stiff Necked?
It is fascinating to study the behavior of the people of Israel during the exodus. They experienced miracles daily. God delivered them from slavery in Egypt, He protected them from the plagues affecting everyone else in Egypt. He lead them as a pillar of cloud and fire. He parted the sea for them. He miraculously provided them food to eat.
In spite of all of these miracles, they still continued to question God's leadership. Often they complained that they would be better off dieing in Egypt as slaves.
We too have been rescued by God from slavery. Romans 6:17-18 says "But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness."
For the last several weeks, I have been trying find the words that pinpoint the change that happened when I "died to Sin" . It is hard for my transformed mind to remember how it thought before my conversion. The primary question I have is Is sin different for a Christian than it is for a non-Christian? Do we engage in Sinful activities with the same motives?
Honestly I cannot remember why I sinned before I was saved. I speculate that I had little guilt and engaged sinful activities because I thought that they might lead to a more fulfilling life.
When I sin now, It is out of weakness. Usually sin is not something that I pursue, but something I fall into because I lack the faith to resist. My failures testify to my need for my Savior.
My confusion over this question leads me back to Exodus. Am I just like the nation of Israel? is God doing a miraculous work in me that I just don't see because it happens every day? Am I blind to God's provision because it is so everyday that it doesn't seem miraculous anymore?